Tuesday, December 04, 2012

Wisdom

I collect things.

I used to collect comics.  I still have my collection, but it now no longer grows every week.

I used to collect unicorns, patches, hats, and at one time seedpods.  On my computer, I have two collections I keep in Word documents.

One is my collection of jokes.  I used to subscribe to many different mailing lists of jokes.  I also subscribe to Bizarre News.  I use to distill the news, taking out all the ads, and spread it around to my friends and family.  I eventually ran out of free time to do that, and also eventually whittled away my jokes emails to nothing.  Now I just add to my jokes when I come across a new one.

My other collection is one that is simply titled “Wisdom.”  It is a long list of quotes that I have found to be true, funny, and/or enlightening.  Every now and then I come across a new quote that hits me just right, and I add it to the list.  I try to attribute where I can, so that when I share them others can know where I found them.

I've cobbled this list from books, comedians, message boards, television, moves, friends, and family.
My latest addition is from Stephen Fry:  This is the point. One technology doesn’t replace another, it complements. Books are no more threatened by Kindle than stairs by elevators.

Then there is this one I just came across in the list today from Scott Adams:  The only time women are not attracted to intelligent men is when they have the option of a good looking guy who is dumber than pants on fish.

And because I do actually add quotes from my friends, this one is from John:  Welcome to R’lyeh Spaceport. Please pick up your bags as they emerge from fifth-dimensional space. Please do not stand near any ninety-degree angles. Please avoid any sentient colours. Please do not make religious offerings until you have exited the premises. Thank you and fhtagn.

He related this one to me when a coworker said:  If I say “You’re welcome,” that’s not a binding contract involving my soul in any way, is it?

And one from another friend:  Everyone’s “fifteen minutes of fame” is turning into everyone’s reality show slo-mo farewell montage.

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