Quotes - Part Five

Reading this group, I realize some of these can be dated.  Like #52, that I think I found around the time Disney was doing a lot of stranger sequels or semi-parallel direct to home movies.  Still, with the thought of the recordings he did that mean there could be an R-rated "Aladdin" this is still a nice little bit of head-canon.

51.                   Only decent girls keep a diary. The others don’t have the time.

--Tallulah Bankhead

52.                   I’m waiting for “Aladdin -.5: Robin Williams Just Talks to Himself in a Bottle”.

--Jon “Ngamer” Barber

53.                   If sweeping ice in front of a rock can become an Olympic event, why not moving your thumbs in front of a television?

--Jon Barber, The Perfect Dark Elite

54.                   Proofreading is more effective after publication.

--Barker

55.                   I think that the team that wins game five will win the series. Unless we lose game five.

--Charles Barkley

56.                   My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character.

--Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself “the Charles Barkley of figure skating”

57.                   Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the progress that has been made in the last 30 years, many foreign people still speak in foreign languages.

--Dave Barry

58.                   Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.

--Dave Barry

59.                   If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she will choose to save the infant’s life without even considering if there are men on base.

--Dave Barry

60.               Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.

--Dave Barry

61.               Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.

--Dave Barry

62.               Thus, the metric system did not really catch on in the United States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the 9-millimeter bullet.

--Dave Barry